God, in His infinite wisdom, has ordered this season of my life so that I work in a high school office. It's a small Christian (private) high school. I never foresaw working in a school setting at all, let alone a high school, but it's been such a pleasant surprise in so many ways.
As I watch them, I find my thoughts wandering to my own high school days. And I think a lot about the book of Proverbs and Wisdom and the different paths that are laid out before us.
I watch them with a jealous eye. I am jealous for them to make good choices, to moment by moment choose the path that leads to life instead of the path that leads to death.
It wasn't so long ago that I was in high school. And I led a double life in some ways. I was a Christian in a public school. I sensed there were plenty of eyes watching my every move and waiting for a misstep. But I was pretty good at pretending. I don't want to be overly dramatic here -- it wasn't all pretending. I was growing in my faith and I wanted to know the Lord more and more, but I did find myself caught in the snare of secret sin. Very secret sin. I don't think I told anyone until I was in college that I struggled at all that way. Unfortunately, no one was really talking about my kind-of struggle -- the sort that seemed so gray, but only because no one was helping me see the blackness. There were lots of black and white rules: No drinking, no sex, no drugs, no cheating, no cussing, etc. I wasn't talking to anyone about it. Everyone probably thought I was doing great. I was a leader in my youth group, I raised my hands in worship, I didn't do any of the big no-no's that everyone would know about. Meanwhile, there were many tearful nights agonizing over all the things that I so desperately wanted to hate...but did anyway...and maybe I enjoyed them...and even if I didn't, I felt powerless to stop.
I clearly remember often wondering why God was such a "kill-joy"? Why did He have to make things so hard for us? Why did He set up so many rules that were so hard to follow? Did He like to see me struggle and fail and be miserable? Or did He "get off on withholding" from us?
At that time in my life, I was so consumed with the problem of getting out of the snare of secret sin that I didn't really stop to address those deeper questions. I just wanted to be rescued and to be better. I just wanted to know that I know forgiven. The Good News is that, in Jesus, I was and am and will always be forgiven for all of my failures. That was really good news. Freeing news. Transforming news. Despite all my pretending and all my shame and all my secrets, I was forgiven. I was loved!
But there was more Good News. News that began to take root in that season when my soul so desperately needed to feel the forgiveness and acceptance of the Gospel, but really started to blossom several years later.
It hit me like a ton of bricks on my honeymoon. Don't worry, I am not going to get too personal here. But I am going to talk about it...because somebody needs to.
My snare of secret sin happened to be in the realm of sexual purity. It doesn't matter, for my purposes right now, "how far I went" or "if I was a virgin or not" or "what my definition of virginity is", the point is that I went outside the boundaries God set for purity. Those are all of the wrong questions. Because the standard is not virginity, it is purity. But there are plenty other snares of sin to be caught in and they can also wreak havoc in your life, whether it's lack of submission to authority, purity, drinking, seeking approval of others over approval of God, choosing to manipulate and control others rather than to bless and serve them, performance, pretending, apathy, recklessness, and the list could go on and on.
It hit me that: "The law" is there to care for us and protect us, written by a Lawgiver who understands that life outside of God's created intent destroys us.
God is the farthest thing He could be from a kill-joy.
He's the opposite of a kill-joy.
He created you for joy - to enjoy Him!
He gives us the Law to protect us from going to lesser things - things that promise enjoyment or prosperity or respect or fulfillment of some kind, but that are empty and only lead to more emptiness.
I watch my high school friends with a jealous eye because I am still dealing with choices that I made in high school - choices that led to other choices that led to other choices. And all choices have consequences.
The Proverbs tell us that there are choices that lead to life and they are choices that lead to death. They speak of Lady Folly and of Lady Wisdom - both call out to us, offering their wares. Folly will destroy us - it steals our joy, damages our relationships, warps our minds, sometimes even hurts our bodies. Wisdom, on the other hand, leads to the abundant life that we were created for.
I'm not just talking about those big fork-in-the-road choices, either. I'm talking about the daily choices that shape who we are: how we spend our free time, how we treat the people around us, how we spend our money, etc. When we practice making good decisions day-in and day-out (treasuring the Word, respecting our parents, loving our neighbor, serving others, living with humility), we are better equipped to make good choices when we hit the fork in the road. In fact, often, we often don't even hit the same fork in the road had we been walking down the path of folly.
So, what if you have already befriended Lady Folly? What if you've been heading down the path that leads to death? There is Good News for you. Wisdom still holds out her hand to you. She welcomes you to turn around (repent) and follow her to the path that leads to life. That path is the fear of the LORD. What do I mean by that? Mostly, trusting the Lord! Knowing the He created the world and everything in it - He knows how it works. And He created you - for a life of enjoying Him and glorifying Him (which happen to be the exact same thing). His heart for you is to care for you and protect you, to see you thrive in the life He's given you.
Folly's charm is deceitful. Her beauty is fleeting. The fear of the Lord - that brings good and not harm. It is more precious than rubies and nothing you desire can compare with it.
Oh, how I pray that each of my high school friends will choose to trust the Lord and His heart to protect them sooner rather than later! So much of what I learned, I learned the hard way -- being burned by folly. There are easier ways, less agonizing ways :-). I pray that they will choose - daily and forever - wisdom and the path that leads to abundant life.
